Mondays....

While my Monday wasn't terrible but it could have been started earlier. I didn't end up getting out of bed for good until almost NOON!! That means that I was dragging all day and not a whole lot got done. My husband and I have never been early morning people, but on a good day I'm normally up and moving no later than 9am. As a first time mom to a 9 week old, lack of sleep has become a part of the daily drill. Apparently, my lack of sleep caught up with me this morning. Sigh.

Over the next few months, I hope to find a routine that begins earlier than today! I hope to find myself lost in the Word again and trusting more in the power of God that I know is true. It has, to be completely honest, been a very long time since I truly studied the Word and even longer since I was involved in a church group. I have seen the power of prayer, the power of faith and yet, I still find myself  "too busy" at the end of the day to read and be fed. It's a bit embarrassing to admit, but it's the truth.

The last couple years have been extremely tough on my husband and I. Financially, we have made some big mistakes and have found ourselves struggling with no end in sight. I am determined for 2013 to be a better year: spiritually, financially, in our marriage, in our parenting, in organizing our house, our family, and in our (currently non-existent) church life. I'd really like for us to find a good, solid church to be involved in around here.

This will be the year of change. Starting now.

My baby is 2 months old!

Today my baby girl is 2 months old!! 2 months old!! Where have the last 8 weeks gone?? They have flown by so fast!! At 2 months she is outgrowing newborn size diapers and newborn size clothes. Many things that fit just a couple weeks ago, are now too small. It makes me sad, but I know it means she's happy and healthy and growing like she should!

She is holding her head up more when she's on your shoulder and her sleeping pattern is a little bit better now too. It's so sweet to listen to her coo and "talk"!  She's eating close to 6 ounces now and we have started laying her down in her crib at night to sleep. How's that going? Well, let's just say it's going to take a while to make that a smooth transition. 

We've been signing simple signs with her and even though she is too young to be coordinated enough, we like to believe she tries to mimic us! We've focused on "mama", "daddy", "food", and of course, "I love you". 

She doesn't seem to be a fan of "tummy time" although I am trying to give her a bit more of it every day. She loves her monkey mobile that plays music and lights up! She loves music and sometimes she will "dance" to whatever is playing! 

Her 2 month check up is next week and I'm eager to find out how long she is and how much she weighs!

My baby girl is absolutely the most precious, sweet baby! Of course, I'm quite partial! :)

Here's to celebrating all the milestones month 3 will bring to us!

Snippet of my Life Map from 2010

Originally written in 2010.....

".......Nothing extraordinary happened in my childhood. Became a Christian when I was a child but it wasn't until Look Up as a teen that I began to understand what it meant to really live for Christ.  I was always highly involved in all aspects of church so I knew all the right answers etc.

So I grew up in church (Nanny made sure of it); was home schooled until high school; graduated in 2004 from SHS; went through two major church splits. Got married (first time) in 2005 at twenty and completed that divorce by 25. And I've been in 4 churches in my lifetime.

I really didn't pay attention to watching God work in my life until the last two years. I've watched Him bring amazing goodness out of a heart-wrenching and devastating church split which became this amazing group of people called Catalyst. I've watched Him bring me from the pit of despair with my divorce to life after. To finding joy and hope again. I've watched Him provide for me over and over when it seemed like nothing was going to work. I've watched him do amazing things in all our lives over and over. And I truly believe that in the early stages of my divorce that if it hadn't been for Catalyst, I may have seriously fallen into depression. That’s how devastated I was. But looking back and knowing what I know now I am eternally grateful God pulled me out of that relationship when He did and I’m so glad I chose to cling to Him through all of it. I wouldn't be who I am today if it hadn't been for that. The love and the encouragement and hope that Catalyst has poured out on me has been amazing. ......"

Lessons from a Month of Mommy-hood

Our baby girl is five weeks old already! I cannot believe how fast time has passed! Seems like just yesterday I was trying to determine if the cramps I felt were real contractions or not!!

Even though I've only been a mom for a little over a month, there are already many lessons I've learned that I want to write down so I remember them for the next baby we have!

In a month of Mommy-hood I've learned:

• To breastfeed a LOT while in the hospital! I don't think I fed her near as much as I could have, which would have helped establish my supply I believe. 
• To pump starting immediately to build up a "freezer supply" of breastmilk. I wish, wish, wish I had done this from the beginning!!
• To use the "natural ways" to increase breastmilk right away & have those items on hand before the baby is born. 
• To get involved with a La Leche group before birth!!
• To take a "natural birthing" class and a breastfeeding class (and/or meet with a lactation consultant).
• To eat better (starting during pregnancy) and drink a LOT more than normal!
• To use cocoa/shea butter from the beginning of pregnancy. To note, I am not ashamed or embarrassed by my stretch marks--they are a symbol of the child I carried and grew to love even before she was born!
• To have more than one or two newborn size outfits. Our little girl was (and still is) tiny, and while this might not be everyone's case, I only had a couple onesies that fit her when she came home. 
• To have a can of formula and a couple bottles with slow-flow nipples on hand just in case breastfeeding doesn't work out before you're ready to introduce bottles.
• To have a couple different brands/types of pacifiers on hand. Baby didn't like the ones we'd been given, so we had to buy a different type for her. 
• That, while it may cause nipple confusion in some babies, sometimes a pacifier can calm not only the baby, but the parents as well. 
• To have witch hazel, pads, liners, and "adult" wipes on hand for the aftermath of birth!
• That the pads and mesh panties the hospital has are lifesavers those first few days!
• That Motrin and stool softeners are your best friends in the days after birth!
• To linger in that first shower after birth...it feels soooo amazingly good!!
• To not end up on your back during labor. The pressure and pain increased significantly when laying down. I believe if I had been able to get up and walk around a bit more towards the end, that I would not have been in so much pain.
• To not let the doctors and nurses insist on the "purple pushing" way...(pushing while holding your breath and they count to 10...it decreases oxygen to you and baby).
• To make sure that the doctor on call has a chance to view our birth plan before delivery takes place. The doctor on call was great, but wasn't aware of our birth plan (I don't believe) and a few things I wanted didn't happen.
• That you can never have too many burp cloths, diapers, or wipes!
• That doubles of everything are a-okay...especially if you have a 2 story house!!
• That a sound machine or soft music can be your best friend at nap and bedtime!
• SLEEP WHEN THE BABY SLEEPS!! (I still have not mastered this!!)
• To act like its no big deal when people flip out because you went through all of labor and delivery with NO pain meds!
• To not allow your household to be deathly quiet when baby is sleeping. We have made sure that baby has been exposed to all sorts of sounds when awake and asleep. This child will sleep through most anything once she's truly asleep...or asleep in our arms!! 
• That my baby girl is worth everything bit of pain I went through!

I'm certain there are so many more things that I will find to add to this list as life with baby rolls on!! I am so excited to be a Mom and am loving everything about it...except for the sleepless nights!! There is nothing like it in the world!!

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas, from our family to yours!!!

Stationery card

View the entire collection of cards.

A Random Vent

Feeling anxious tonight and just need to vent/list make a little bit. So much I feel I need to do but I'm so exhausted by the time I get home from work and with very few days off I am overwhelmed. My list continues to grow and yet I never seem to truly mark things off the list. The more I/we clean the dirtier the house seems to get---or maybe its just that it get dirtier quicker. Sigh. With a dog, three cats, and the two of us the dust and critter hair and dirt is never-ending.  I know its just "stuff" and its the pregnancy hormones, my OCD, and the nesting all kicking in at the same time, but I truly cannot stand to be so disorganized!! I am quickly getting to a point in my life where clutter is not welcome anymore. I still have a terrible time getting rid of things but little by little clutter is working it's way OUT!  (Disclaimer....just because it says "I" does not mean I am not including my husband. He is a part of my "I".)    

These are the things I need/want that I feel will make this process go a little faster. I need a sewing machine. Period. That will help with a lot. I need a media cabinet for DVD's/CD's/VHS (if they will fit), and hubby's games. I need a place for the extra electronic stuff we don't use on a daily basis but that's not very pretty to look at it. I need a cabinet of sorts to house the fragile items. I will find one. Sooner than later I hope. Wish I had a place to unpack the fragile boxes to evaluate how much space I think I will need. I need some way to organize the toys, coloring books, clothes, and all else that comes with two little girls (and another on the way). I need shelves for the wall in the kitchen and the bedroom. I need some command hooks to put in the storage room for bags and coats and such. I need monkey hooks or the like for hanging the rest of the pictures/wall hangings. I need to figure out a better paper organizing system and get rid of more paper-stuff we don't need to hang on to. I need to find a way to menu plan so that maybe we eat better and don't have the constant question of "what's for dinner?". 

I need to find a way to get more income coming into our house so that we can pay off this stinking debt that is hanging over our heads and sitting on my shoulders and weighing me down. That would be a huge thing!! Not including my student loans I have probably $6000 hanging over my head.....not a lot to some people but too much for someone who doesn't make much and has many other things she'd like to do with her life.  I love the organizing blogs I read and have gathered a bunch of great ideas but getting started is the hardest part. Trying not to spend a lot of money to do so is also a challenge.  

Sigh. Well, I've vented a bit and now I need to go try to sleep as I work early in the morning. Maybe tomorrow will have a bit of productivity in it for me. I sure hope so. 

Must Do!

Just a short blog...more for my sake than yours honestly...so much to do and time keeps getting away from me! Usually if I write it down it gets done quicker!!

• I need to seriously sit down and research pediatricians for this baby girl!!
• I need to rewrite my resume cover letter and start applying for jobs at Christian day-cares. If I have to work I want to be in a Christian setting and if I have to put my baby in daycare I want it to be where I'm at if at all possible. 
• I need to research daycare centers. 
• I need to blog..both on my Chaos blog and on this one here!
• Hubby and I need to put together the bunk beds in the girls' room so we can figure out how much room is leftover for baby stuff!! Plus it needs to be reorganized!
• I need to pick up the pace a bit on the blanket I'm crocheting for Kensei!
• Critter nails need to be trimmed & monthly meds need to be given!!!!
• Oil change needs to happen for at least one car before our trip home!!
• I seriously need a good manicure for my terribly destroyed nails!
• I'm waiting on my 3 ring binders to arrive so I can redo at least one scrapbook and hopefully get it put on a shelf instead of sitting in a basket!
• Still working on cleaning out FB friends, blocking a few, and creating lists to get junk out of my newsfeed!! Then I just have to remember to go look at those lists LOL!!
• Same with Pinterest. I've been creating new boards and organizing those and deleting pins I don't want/don't like/links don't work, etc!
• I need to keep writing for my childrens books and look into some local writing classes (for me) and art classes (for hubby). 

So lots to do and I'm feeling a panic attack coming on with the whirlwind of this list, plus the whirlwind of hours I'm working between now and the next two weeks!! At least at the end of those two weeks we get to go home for a mini vacation and get to see family and I get to get my hair cut!! :)